Care

“The application of Emmi Pikler’s respectful and affectionate image of the baby, to various contexts of care around the world (day care, institutions, families) … has helped babies to develop well, and adults to change their internal representations of the baby’s capacities and their role as care providers.” 

(Introducing the Piklerian Developmental Approach: History and Principles, The Signal World Association for Infant Mental Health Newsletter, 2010)

Loreta, 4 months 

The caregiver brings the child to the changing table; the child smiles and touches their clothes.

The caregiver says, “Yes, I will change your diaper.”

Caregiving involves cooperation and relationship-building. It is not only about feeding, changing, putting the child to sleep, or lifting them correctly. It is a moment when we can offer to the child a respectful attitude, express our attitude through both verbal and body language, and our impression of who they are. It is a time when we get to know each other and are truly together. Language comprehension and cooperation are learned during these moments.

It is very important to pay attention to how we touch children, how we respond to them, how we address them, and whether we are able to respect their free time and wishes. Our relationship with the child forms the foundation for their future relationships with other people; therefore, it is important to give them all the tools they need to be able to integrate, to dare, and to be accepted. Our attitude also shapes the child’s self-esteem. Self-esteem is a person’s evaluation of themselves in different areas of life or situations; it is a general perception of oneself and one’s own worth.

In the book Developmental Psychology, several conditions are mentioned that are necessary to foster positive self-esteem in a child:

• Love the child unconditionally.

• Acknowledge the child’s achievements and abilities.

• Structure tasks in a way that allows the child to succeed and thus experience a sense of achievement.

• Create a feeling that the child is in control of their own life in situations where they are not in danger—for example, choosing between two pairs of tights.

• Do not compare the child with others; notice and emphasize the child’s uniqueness.

• Intervene if the child puts themselves down.

• Set a positive example through a genuine attitude toward oneself.

Emmi Pikler also highlighted these values as fundamental, stating that every child is truly unique in their abilities and skills. In the child’s environment, everything is thoughtfully considered—it is created according to the child’s abilities and interests, establishing a balance between challenges and the skills the child wishes to strengthen or experiment with at their current level.

In 2016, a documentary about Lóczy by Bernard Golse and Miriam Rasse was released. The film stated:

"For a child, it is deeply important—perhaps even essential—to be seen by an adult with truly attentive eyes.

A child will never forget the person whose genuine presence and gaze they have felt. 

Perhaps it is the caregiver who can become that adult—one who truly sees the child"

Also, the film quoted psychologist Geneviève Appell**

“Such a young child, who has to move from one area of life to another, cannot yet, on their own, create a link between their different experiences and who they are. There is a risk that they may lose the continuity of their existence. This means that the caregiver’s main task is, through their presence and observation, to ensure this continuity—by noticing even the smallest things, remembering them together with the child, and supporting the formation of the child’s personal life story.”

*Serbe Sandra un Miltuze Anika. Attīstības psiholoģija. Cilvēka attīstība visas dzīves garumā (Developmental psychology. Human development throughout life). 2022. Zvaigzne ABC.

**Geneviève Appell worked closely with E. Pikler and is a co-author of the film “A Baby’s Attention at Play”.